I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize