where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Randomize
