He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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