why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
My hand turned me down
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
