She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
why is half of my head shaved?
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