it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize