I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
