i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
