Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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