No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
