we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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