lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Randomize