Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
So much rum. So many feels.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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