My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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