i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
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I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
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Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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