hell yes lets make some ravioli
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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