Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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