We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
