we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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