Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize