Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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