im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I supernannyed him into submission
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
