girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
