East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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