she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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