I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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