OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
