whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she smelled like a LAN party
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
