Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
