Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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