absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
