i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
