Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis