i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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