Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
