i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
