I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
