didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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