I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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