If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
