you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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