the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
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Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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