About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Pants are for mortals
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
