HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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