I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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