Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
