I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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