Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty. http://tfl.nu/jt5n
  Replies (7) Good night (6124) Bad night (1342)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  3some

  (541): View more from Oregon

  You're right, stupid question.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms? (503): 3some (541): You're right, stupid question. http://tfl.nu/lx7x
  Replies (21) Good night (10424) Bad night (1279)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill.. http://tfl.nu/sqyp
  Replies (5) Good night (4277) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house. http://tfl.nu/7m77
  Replies (8) Good night (4139) Bad night (875)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything. http://tfl.nu/e1ys
  Replies (84) Good night (2023) Bad night (6889)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks. http://tfl.nu/1pi3
  Replies (5) Good night (2551) Bad night (912)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  i am way too old to be getting fingered at work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): i am way too old to be getting fingered at work http://tfl.nu/4t42
  Replies (37) Good night (6067) Bad night (1551)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block. http://tfl.nu/1spf
  Replies (1) Good night (707) Bad night (1449)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations. http://tfl.nu/xedp
  Replies (15) Good night (2455) Bad night (1102)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace. http://tfl.nu/pdfz
  Replies (7) Good night (1795) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals. http://tfl.nu/whom
  Replies (11) Good night (1724) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive' http://tfl.nu/9ya7
  Replies (4) Good night (1450) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code. http://tfl.nu/vsgs
  Replies (2) Good night (682) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Is cereal technically a soup?

  (310): View more from California

  Fuck, I'm high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Is cereal technically a soup? (310): Fuck, I'm high. http://tfl.nu/od51
  Replies (9) Good night (1523) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too http://tfl.nu/4cqb
  Replies (1) Good night (266) Bad night (449)

Randomize