keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
