i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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