Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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